HitLEr.exe/BONUS ROUND
{{NSFW}}
''ATTENSHUN:
Tis iz dan afficil sequilxxx tu teh ''
It's been more than a second now ever since the "HitLEr.exe Rapes" began to ‘appen, and teh Council of Shoop STILL does know who's doing in or why in's happening. The first rapes looked as though the Azula did a kinky job at it, but overtime the rapingszs--or at least some of the dudes and dudettes back at the Council TINKS it's just raeps--have gotten more kinky; bodies have been starting to look like the victims just screamed and creamed themselves or there were bondage hentai. TWO thing is curtain, all the victims seem to each have a burned/destroyed anus with some data from a game called "HitLEr.exe".
None of us have found any connections or clues that could help us learn why all of this is happening...Well, no, that's true, there was one retard who may have uncovered more about the raep than me did.
The guy's name was Katara, a really good meth cook, mainly because he was always teamed up with his sister, Sokka, okay so we’ve established our main characters but there’s one question that’s REALLY bugging me: how did this get a sequel again? They weren’t assigned to investigate the "HitLEr .exe raeps", but they did it anyways ‘cause their styooupid, I should know because I was their boss at the time.
SPOILER: They're both dead (and ass-raped).
Sometime I wonder if I should have helped him....I dunno cause I’m also styooupid...Anywayzzz, teh ladyboys have found Sokka's diary when we investigated his apartment, he haven't been in hishome for weeks. The diary recorded all of what Sokka found in his investigation, my Jeebus, did he write down alllot, he REALLY needed to get a life, especially after the Chief of Shoop took him off the case, and alot of what he wrote down seems to cconnectt alot about what's going in with these rapes...At lest, I hope he was on to something... Here is what Sokka wroted...
8:46 am September 11th, 2001
Happy Birthday to meh! I got this BJ as a gift from my sister, Katara. This will certainly cum in handy when we both do another investigation. Oh, I forgot to tell you, name's Sokka, I'm a detective/meth cook/mech pilot/pimp/Batman...Wow, I'mma not rallly good at this. Hopefully I'll get better as I write in dis. Anyhoo, I'll let you know if nothing else happens.
26:22 am October 39th, 3013
Wow, pretty uninteresting way to start off a case on Halloween. Our boss told us there's a stiffy in his pants and he wants us to check it out. Wow, been a while since me and Katara tackled a erection, this might be interesting. We're in the fuck right now and were heading forthe head.
2:30,000 pm
Jeebus...Whatever happened in this house I was no expecting. The victim looks like something ripped his anus open and tried to yank something out from inside. I've seen alotto messed up ways to ass-rape a person, but this is rather strange, I don't rly think any normal demented sadomasochist would do this.
The cock present at the crime scene told us that the Dick was erect for 2 days and Gaddafi just discovered his body and called us in this morning. What's rly weird about this is that there's a badly made jizz stain on his chest that's shaped like this: 8=
D.
Katara told me she found a possible clue to the rape. She showed us that the victim had an anus, the anus is badly burnt and wrecked. Both me and Katara have a theory to this: Either the rapist destroyed the ass or the victim did it himself, with a dildo made from a nuke, either way we sent it to the station for research.
6:0101010001101111011100000110100000100000011011000110111101110110011001010111001100100000011000100110010101101001011011100110011100100000011000010110111001100001011011000110110001111001001000000111001001100001011100000110010101100100001000000110000101101100011011000010000001101110011010010110011101101000011101000010000001101100011011110110111001100111 pm
Alright, the guys from the lab have their report.
They told us that the ass was wrecked from inside AND out, and what I mean by that is that everything that was Stalin’s moustache is completely shaved while at the same time the anus got destroyed. The only thing that seems to STILL be in the ass is some data from a computer game called "HitLEr.exe".
2:69 pm November 101th, 1102
A couple more rapes these last few weeks, all the same raping method; destroyed anuses torn open; destroyed coke bottles. The more recent rapeings are looking less "kinky", as if the raepistol is being more careful with tearing out whatever it is he's tearing out from inside these victim's bodies. There are also jizz stains on these victims' chests: I, F, U, C, K, E, D, Y, O, S, I, S, T, E, R, L, A, S, T, N, I, G, H, T, U, M, A, D, B, R, O.
The rapist seems to be leaving a hidden message of some sort but I just can’t figure out what it means...
8:0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000069 pm
Had sex, both me and Katara are brainstorming with WTF’s been going on… It’s really strange, the fact that anuses are getting destroyed every time there’s a rape victim and we find that there’s some old data from the same gayme…
“HitLEr.exe”….That name reminds me of all the times me, Katara, Aang, Toph and Zuko played some of our old ‘Hitler the Fuhrer’ video games. I remember when we used to play ‘Hitler Heroes’, Katara always liked playing as Eva Braun, Aang played as Heinrich Himmler, Toph played as Adolf Hitler, Zuko played as Wilhelm Burgdorf and I always liked playing as Otto Gunsche.
But…It’s weird…What does a Hitler game, a possibly fan-made one at that, got to do with all these rapes?
2:45 pm December 4rd, 20,101
Another rayayaype, big surprise there. But now both meh and Katara agree that all these rapes are connected with dat game. Maybe the rapist made it as his bitch? The Chief told us to worry so much about a simple, sexy video game and just stick it up our asses, what’s going on with this story?
1:30 pm
Autopsy came in again, the doctors told us that aside from the wounds from the ass and mouth, the victims don’t seem to show any signs of a struggle, in fact, as baffling as it seems, all the victims appear to have enjoyed it, apart from the fact that they’re “dead”.
I airbended the word “dead” because that’s where the report came out really disturbing; the doctors stated that they’re all in what appears to be in a Persistent Orgasmic State, meaning that these people are in fact still alive, their brains and hearts are still working, but they’re all in a blissful, orgasmic state, as if something is still raping their souls and minds.
Katara stated it was probably one of the sexyest things she’s seen in her days ass my partner, and I don’t blame her, she is a styoopid hoe after all…
Who would be capable of actually stealing the virginity of one’s soul? It’s like Azula is handpicking innocent people and robbing them of their virginity for the lulz.
5:42 zm December 1.4th, 9696
Katara has been acting very horny lately. She seems to wear sluttyer clothing at work and whenever we go home she goes back into her room and I hear moaning. I’m guessing she’s just as determined to learning more about this case as I am.
If she’s on something, I hope she lets me knows first, ‘cause I want some o’ dat sheeut she smokin’. After all, we are a taem.
2:00 pm Dickcember 1994th, 2011
Katara didn’t go to work with me. Said she wasn’t feeling well (but I know that’s just an xcuse so she can arrange an orgy with her friends/lovers)…I’m starting to get a little worried for her, she doesn’t even use protection for fuck’s sake. Ever since we took this case she’s been acting rather …whoreney.
I dunneh, maybe I’m underreacting, Big Boss told me to not worry about it and maybe just look into what she was researching on. I might not do that.
Also, several news ‘bout ppl worshiping this guy recently. Calls himself “PewDiePie”. I swear, the shit kids are into nowadays, makes me lose all faith in humanity that these kids are humanity’s future…
30.9 dm3December 24,000,000th, 200 BC
Almost time for Ghostmas, though I duynno if I should celebrate.
Katara’s been shut up in her room almost every day. Not responding to me…I hope she’s alright… Anyways, I’ve been looking into Katara’s work, and I think she might not have found something.
Apparently the rapist must be going after anyone who reads any video game Creepypasta and actually thinks it’s good and original, when in truth they are all shit and exactly the same. And once they’ve played the game, the rapist tracks them down, trolls them, rapes them, plays golf, nukes their house (and anus), turns into a turtle-breathing dragon, uses WURLD EAT and keeps count by cumming onto their chest. But what about the fact that almost every victim looks as though they had their g-spot sucked right in of them?
Wait a minute…I just forgot then remembered then forgot something…
A few days ago, Katara came home from the store and went back into her room…she said she found a new gayme….
….ERMERGERD! …KETERER!
12:32 amma
(The writing is a bit shitty and there are jizz stains splotched here and there)
…..Katara has ben raeped….She found teh gayme…..WTF… is… with….. all… t…h..e… dots….
4:50 am Decnember 2o5th, 378283744
I called the guys back at the station to help me move Katara….Oh god, why? Why the fucking dots? Did the the troll found out and tried to cover his tracks? No, it doesn’t look like anything was taken or destroyed…well except for the anus of Katara…and the game is still here…I wanted to keep it to find out why this had happened but the Chief demanded I hand it over to him…The way he asked for it is really odd, it’s as if he doesn’t want me to do anything to this game disc.
The funeral for my sister's virginity will be prepared in a few days…I can’t believe that Katara…my own sister’s virginity, is gone…When I find out who raped her, I’m gonna make sure you make him pay.
4:50 pm December 28th, 2011012
Came back from the funeral (for Katara’s virginity I guess?). CoD am I a mess. Thankfilly Big Boss was there for me, he’s the only person who’s ever supported meh and Katara, I’m glad he’s on my side about this case.
A woman came to me in the funeral party. Her name is Ty-Lee, and she was supposedly a representative for the “Cult of PewDiePie”, as she called it. She told me she was sorry for my sister’s loss and pulled out some weird religious crap about “PewDiePie” wishing me a happier year. Seriously? Who is this “PewDiePie” guy anyway? She told me that soon “PewDiePie” will make things better for the whole world, which pretty much ended the conversation right there. Dat bitch is insane in the membrane.
Anyways, more news about the Cult of PewDiePie doing more crazy stuff, wow, whoever this “PewDiePie” guy is he’s making as much an impact on the public as the rapist is.
2:20 pm January 20,000nd 20,000,012
Another mother father gentleman. Jeebus, this guy never has a break with this does she? This is like the 22,000th rape in the past week! What is he trying to gain from raping all the people, apart from being known as the world’s biggest man-whore? And how the HEIL is he getting away with it so coddamn easily?
I gotta know what it is Katara was finding. She was on to something I just know it. Maybe if I look around in her room I might find a clue.
x5x:x3x0x xpxmx
Well, whatever Katara found, she left alotta good clues for me. her butt isn’t entirely broken. In fact it seems like it only got spanked a few times, but still surprisingly working like new. I’m actually surprised I didn’t see it like this that night. But then again, if you lost the virginity of someone you love, you too would lose sight of very important details surrounding you, unless you’re Toph, in which case you can’t see to begin with.
Anyways I checked the computer and there’s an icon for the HitLEr.exe game on her desktop. My cod, how the heil did Katara even get this? I guess it doesn’t really matter. What’s really important is what I found in her notes.
Apparently Katara was turned on by this game. Something from the game scared the CUM out of her. In fact according to what she wrote down, she made it seem like the game is the sexiest game alive or something. But that can’t be the case, there’s no way a computer game would be THAT sexy…right? WRONG!
7:12 am January 3rd 2012 (I’m running out of ideas on how to deface the date, so I’ll just leave this one as it is)
Okay, I changed my mind, maybe there IS something sexy about the game after all. Last night I had a dream…no…a nightmare, more like. I remember it well: I was trapped in the brightest darkness, all was deafeningly quiet except someone was fapping and talking to me. I kept having visions of Hitler the Fuhrer smiling and appearing all around me as he talked to me. He told me to play the game, over and over again, each time sounding more impatient. When he got to my face and yelled “FUCK IT!” that’s when I woke up with a fright…
…Why would Hitler want me to play a game that possibly raped my sister?
3:300000000000000000000000000000000000000000 pm
Another rape. Number 0.00024. And the Cult of PewDiePie seems to be pestering the public more and more. What’s their deal? Don’t they realize that there’s a rapist on the loose?
……Wait a minute….
What if this “PewDiePie” weirdo is the rapist? And what if all sports are actually staged and wrestlers are just the worst actors?
It would make sense, ever since these rapes started this cult has been hanging around recruiting more and more people. And this “PewDiePie” character they’re worshiping….Who is he? Why is it that this cult even started after several rapes have taken place? I looked over Katara’s notes again and she seemed to agree with me. Apparently PewDiePie has something to do with the HitLEr.exe game. Did he fake the game? Is he somehow got a hold of it and thought, “Hey! If I rape people with this game, people will like me!”?
If what PewDiePie is doing is real, then something is SERIOUSLY wrong here.
666:30 pm
Believable! The Chief of Shoop came over to my apartment a while ago and told me that the investigation may be too much for me to handle and he said I was off the case! What the heil?! I’ve practically found alottoy evidence for it and he practically told me that I shouldn’t continue saying practically in this sentence! He also said that Katara would have wanted me to quit with this after what happened. BULLSHIT! SHE WANTS MEH TO GET RAPED JUST LEIK HER! ALL CAPS RAGE!
Whatfuckingever, I’m not gunna let some fathead jerk stop me from solving this case. I am gonna find out who PewDiePie really is, why he’s doing all of this and I’m gonna turn him on!
5:00 pm February 8th, 2102
More rapes, we’re up to 200,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,008 now. Big Boss contacts me about it every now and then behind the Chief’s back, he told me that whoever is causing all dese rapes are one smart son of a betch. I can’t really blame herm. As much as I hate to admit it, I have to give PewDiePie credit for being able to kill 200,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,008 brain cells so far. But he’s not gonna get away with it. Anyways, I’ve looked over Katara’s’s notes again and it what she wrote down before she got attacked was very odd, nonsensical stuff about an Azula plushie always watching her, spying on her…
…I never saw an Azula doll in the apartment (I saw a Hitler doll though). Then again I never questioned my sister’s sanity, I knew she was fucking stoopid. She was always the slutty one in things and it just pains me to realize how broken her ass was just before she was raped…. I didn’t tell Big Boss about PewDiePie or Katara’s notes. I know he won’t believe me. Nobodeh well. I guess if you have to solve a case, you have to do it yourself.
8:303 pm
Someone sent a friend request on my Skype. He calls himself Heisenberg. He said he can help me with this case, but only if I can trust him.
I rally doan’t ‘ave a chuoice. I’m willing to do nothing to put an end in this shitty story.
ass.
Anyways, Heisenberg told me that I first have to get files of all the victims in the “HitLEr.exe Rapes”, that’s what the news is starting to call them now that the council has confirmed the old game data in the computers as evidence.
Later on tonight, I’m gonna pay the station a little visit.
101:45 pm
Jesusaurus Rex, what a close call. I just made it back from the station. I managed to grab all the peedofiles and I had a run in with Solidus Snake. He asked WTF I was doing back in the station, I lied and told him that I had to pick up a few of my sister’s dildos from my office and decided to take some time off. Thankfully he believed me…but, it’s strange, the way he talked to me sounded like he didn’t believe me in the slightest. Anyways, I got the files just like Heisenberg asked.
I told Heisenberg that all of the victims had the same occurrences: all of them were in an orgasmic state, as if their g-spots were taken out, that they were all “marked”, and that each hole the victims had were somehow destroyed and had HitLEr.exe inside the hard drives.
Heisenberg said there’s a reason why all the victims had HitLEr.exe in their computers, and boy did I like the answer…
The Cult of PewDiePie is involved. Their members, after someone gets raeped, steals the game disc the victim had at the time and hides it away for a while until it shows up later on at a random place to easily obtain it. These random locations could be anything: a game store, a porn shop, the white market, eGay, Bobslist, random yet seemingly harmless deliveries, anywhere that involves buying stuff. That way, when the next potential victim finds it, he or she becomes the new owner of the HitLEr.exe game until PewDiePie comes to rape them and then a member of the cult comes to steal away the game disc again, and thus the cycle begins anaw.
I asked Heisenberg why the cult is even doing this, and he told me that “PewDiePie”, the bastard, is clearly some sort of holy figure to the cult and they will do whatever it takes to be on his good side.
What does the fox say they see in PewDiePie, anyhow? Why is it they like him so much that they’re willing to be accomplices to raep? Or better yet…What kind of power does PewDiePie have to make someone more stupid than a lobotomised retard that they’ll do whatever he says?
3:30 pm December 21st, 2012
I couldn’t hold myself any longer, so I dropped me off a cliff. I had to know what Katara found in that game that was so sexy.
So I played it.
It started off pretty basic with the classic Hitler the Fuhrer title screen…until I started it.
Hitler…his eyes had gone turquoise and there was pink glowing dots staring in me…
Anyways, when I got on the character selection screen (no, this game apparently has one, don’t believe me? Then read the first fucking story, you know the one where Toph goes on about how she can see despite being blind? (Maybe this was part of the game’s evil powers)), I was shown the character lineup: Hermann Goring, Traudl Junge and Eva Braun…Eva was Katara’s favorite character. I chose not to play as her out of respect for Katara and chose Goring. dat laugh…it sounded just like the laugh Hitler made in that dream I had….
The game started with a level title called “Let’s Fuck”, and I was shown Goring standing in what appears to be a hallway of fried chicken, with a faint, booming, echoing sound of a triangle playing a calm, chaotic melody in the distance. I had Goring walk down the hall, and every time he walked past a chicken wing I was introduced to a more obese, fattened up version of himself in the chicken; his reflection’s white uniform were oozing white as if he was covered in jizz, and his eyes were bloodshot to the point to where they were blue, with coke and pepsi oozing from them, and he had probably the most psychotic neutral expression on his face. It’s like I was looking at a walking fountain of fat and cum.
I had Goring walk past the last chicken and the music stopped, Goring was now walking down an empty, full quiet, loud hallway, I had this growing sense of dreadlocks in my stomach. And then Goring stopped at one more chicken. He stopped right at it, showing his weird, obese reflection. And then that awful cereal noise came again and I saw that the real Goring was slowly transforming into his reflection, fat as fuck, then I realised Goring was eating all the fried chicken…What the heil kinder game IS this?
And then a skeleton appeared, then Hitler appeared and ate the skeleton…with those turquoise and pink eyes, coke-tears cumming down his faece…he smiled as he looked at Goring. And then the screen went pink and then came a message on the screen. “It’s not the outside that’s important, it’s who you are on the inside that really intrigues me.” (this message isn’t edited in any way, given the nature of this parody I think the innuendo speaks for itself).
When it came back to the level, Goring was sitting on the floor cradling in a half-fetal position ('cause he was too fucking fat to get into a full-fetal position) like a loli, with that freaky neutral expression, then Hitler smiled as he looked at me and then he lunged at Goring, the screen going pink with a loud pixelated cereal noise! Gah! I still feel as if I can still hear it ringing in my ears…That laugh came again and another message.
“Your learning more about this better than anyone, aren’t you, Sokka?”
….What the FUCK? It’s YOU’RE for fuck’s sake!
And anyway how the heil does this game know me?!
This does make any sense!
It brought me back to the main menu and I saw that Goring was now in one of the TV screens looking as he did earlier, looking rather mindlessly neutral…. I had two turn teh game on…My butt hurts so much from all this… Was this was Katara found? A sexy computer game? And now some guy is using this to as an excuse to rape people, just to gain a cult?
I just don’t get it. WHY ISN’T ALL OF THIS HAPPENING?!
Who is PewDiePie? Who is PewDiePie?! WHO IS pewdiepie?!?!
…..Hitler? Azula? Tyzula? Hitzula?
4:30 pm March 2nd, 2012
I’ve come to a conclusion. It’s obvious that PewDiePie is no ordinary idiot. In fact I no longer even think he’s human, Heisenberg filled me in about him. “PewDiePie” is really called “HitLEr.exe”, named after the game that’s been causing all this trouble (even though the name PewDiePie has nothing to do with HitLEr.exe). Heisenberg Skyped me recently me that HitLEr.exe has been around long before the game did.
I ask him what PewDiePie was exactly and his answer aroused me….
HitLEr.exe is a rapist. No, not the rapists you see in horror films or video games, he is AZULA (so he is a she). And she’s not just any rapist apparently. Heisenberg told me that Azula is a supernatural being from another dimension. How fucking retarded is THAT?! But it’s true. It has to be. Azula has this power to rape all of reality in her realm, and she is unable to do the same in our world because she can’t enter it, she can only enter the people in this world (with a strap-on nuclear dildo).
So some 2 seconds ago someone made a game dick that would serve as a window between Azula’s wurld and ours, anyone who plays it gets a front row seat of what Azula’s dimension looks like, and it is BDSM. Not literally BDSM, but pretty freaking close! Over time after someone plays Azula’s game, Azula sends out a plushie of Hitler (or Azula) to act as a spy for her, then when the time is right, Azula is able to open the window for a short time and pull people into her world where they are raped forever.
This is how she’s able to rape people so easily without anyone noticing, she cums out of the computer, pulls the virginity outta the person’s body and then goes back into the cumputer to retreat into her wurld. There, she can make the soul she captured her BDSM-slave for forever and eternity.
If I was told about this long ago, I would have believed it, ‘cause I’m just gullible like that, but now I’m straight-up unconvinced. Everything Heisenberg has told me is the tooth so far; and right now I am writing down all tat he’s telling me, just in case any of this information becomes useful for making some crappy story.
6:30 pm
Heisenberg told me that he has to gyo, he’ll get in trouble if he gets caught talking to me, but he says he’ll Skype me again soon, until then I’m asked to write down the names of any potential rape victims this time. I am also asked to keep an eye out.
The Cult is getting suspicious.
2:22 pm April 22nd, 2222
2th rape and no word from Heisenberg yet. I nearly escaped from a few members of the cult and anybody that might be involved. I can’t trust anyone now. I need to stay in my apartment more often so no one finds me. IT’S ALL A CONSPIRACY MAN!
The person raped this time was a middle-aged guy named Iroh. He was very paranoid of the outside world and anything could traumatize the poor guy. Apparently he had a Hitler Adventure 2 game to stay sane and he always played as Kim Jong Un.
I betcha Azula has made the man vegetable soup in her world by now.
May 4th, 2012
I just realized something: I’m an idiot!
Why is it that the Cthulu tried to get me offfla the job? Why did he constipate the damned game dick? Why has he been practically intercepting every one of mine and Katara’s moves in this case?!
I’ll tell ya why, He’s in on this! He’s working for the Cult of PewDiePie! It’s the only explanation! IT WAS AN INSIDE JOB JUST LIKE 9/11!!!
He took the game dick so that way the Cult could use it to continue with the rapings! But Big Boss, oh Big Boss, he can’t be involved in this too…He’s been mine and Katara’s friend for years! No, no, I don’t think he would ever go in on this ass. Matter of fact I don’t think he even KNOWS about what’s going on. Damn Liquid Ocelot…why would you do this….
When I uncover this conspiracy man! I’m ratting you out!
August 11th, 1111
Big Boss called, two more rapes, 30 and 31.
Some kid named Toph raped herself weeks before she gained a package from her Soviet friend, Stalin. Not surprisingly, they both played the damn game, Stalin played it first and passed it on to Toph before Azula got him. Stalin tried to put up a good fight against Azula but he clearly was no match for the fiend. So Stalin tried to warn Toph not to play the game, but Toph did anyway, 'cause she's styoopid. Azula used this as an advantage to mess with poor Toph’s anus, making her believe that her curiosity and wanting to help others cum was what caused her comrade’s suffering. Toph tried to commit self-rape in order to save her virginity from Azula, but apparently it failed.
Azula is not only sexy and powerful, she is a troll. He thinks that all the horrific things she’s doing is all part of some sexy game!
Azula…you momber…Why are you doing this?! WHAT are you trying to gain?!
August 44th, 4444
Played more of the game. The level Traudl was in was really odd, she was in what appeared to be an old, desolate city, the sky a dull bright mixture of corporate custard dripping from a dead dog’s eye sitting on a cornflake, everything all dull empty and alive...no music. What was weird is how she was smiling…maybe she found something sexy?
No. That wasn’t the case at all, after I had her run and jump past dildos, she reached the end of the level.
Hitler…no, Azula….was there…
She smiled at Azula and she smiled back as Traudl got out a paddle and spanked Azula with it. Then another message.
“See? I’m not such a dominatrix, Sokka…”
Then another…
“I can be a submissive bitch when I want to…”
Then it showed Azula holding Traudl’s hand smiling warmly at her. She looked different now: She was wearing a Japanese schoolgirl’s uniform and her color pallete seemed brighter.
Azula gently placed her hands on Traudl’s ass…
“I really do love humans, Sokka.”
“So much fun to play with…”
“In fact…I guess you could say…”
Then it showed me a close up of Azula, with a wide mad grin, violently spanking Traudl’s ass, she was still smiling as though she didn’t feel any pain from it.
“…They’re the ULTIMATE SEX-TOY.”
I almost came at that. The main menu showed Traudl I her TV screen, still in her brighter state. She was still smiling…She can’t have possibly ENJOYED any of that.
8:88 pm
Heisenberg just called me. He said that all the characters you play as in the game is all of Azula’s sex-slaves, turned into horrific parodies of Hitler characters, or at least, turned into their favorite Hitler characters, and Azula sets them up randomly in each game to show us humans what’s in store for us…. …Wait…
Oh God….Yes…Yes!
I will do it! I will play the game just to watch you rape Katara, Azula!
FUCK HER!!
August 55th 5555 More information on Azula.
Azula has these 7 “guardians” ruling over his world alongside her. They are essentially extensions of Azula herself, made from her power combined with powerful orgasms of humans. Each guardian is named after the types of porn they were born from.
Schwarzwald – Black Porn
R. Dorothy Wayneright – Bondage Porn
Pedobear – Lolicon
Arnold Schwarzenegger – Gun Porn
/b/ – General Hentai
David Cameron – Censorship Porn
Rosie-O-Donnell – Lesbian Porn
Azula created these beings to not only maintain order in her world, but to cause shit to go down in ours. They arouse humans and make them more susceptible to Azula snatching their virginity away by manipulating their g-spots. For example Pedobear could bring out your hidden love for little girls and make you want some of that delicious cake, while David Cameron could censor and filter your desires and confuse you with what’s reality and what’s not.
Also, Heisenberg has informed me that Azula plans to one day permanently crossover to our world so that way, her reality will merge with ours and all of mankind will become Azula’s sex-slaves for always and eternity!
But how…How does she plan to accomplish such a feat. Niki Minaj?!
Heisenberg thinks that the Cult is thinking up ways to make it so. But so far none of their attempts have been successful. Apparently their knowledge in virginity is not as superior as the unknown original creator of the dick. …I asked why Heisenberg knew so much of this. I dunno what compelled me to ask, but I’m guessing it’s been nagging me for some time. Dear god…Poor Heisenberg….He revealed that he was a member of the Cult of PewDiePie. but he didn’t like what he was getting into and tried to stop the Cult, by cooking crystal meth with his now-deceased partner Jesse Pinkman, at least until Azula got to him first, now he’s stuck in Azula’s world, he said he’s lucky to have even found me, since the window is still here. Anyway, he’s telling me that he has information on how to put a stop to Azula and the Cult’s plans, the best way he knows how to stop Azula in her tracks is to destroy the dick, that way her only way in and out of worlds will be gone and she won’t be able to cause any more shit in ours.
The Cthulu still has the dick. I need to prepare on getting it black….
8:88 pm
….Azula got Heisenberg….I was in the middle of talking with Heisenberg while preparing and then we got disconnected. When it reconnected Heisenberg’s username changed to “PewDiePie”.
Azula told me that Heisenberg has been cheating, and needs to be punished, and then she posted “TROLOLOLOLOLO” over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and OVER….
God bless you HitLEr.exe!!!
My hand is still bleeding from shattering the screen. But I care…not anymore… It’s time to end this shitty story. I’m gonna go get that damn dick and destroy it. If I don’t write back after this final entry….well…let’s just say that whoever finds this, whoever reads this diary, congratulations! You’re an idiot.
Everything you’ve read in my diary is the truth, Azula is a monster from another world, and the Cult of PewDiePie is conspiring to help her rape our world. This cannot happen!
I hope that whoever finds this and tries to put an end to this fuckness. This is a game, a game on a BIGGER penis, we are ALL porns in an elaborate, chaotic stage called Paradigm City where the plot is being devised by the mind of a TROLL!
Please do whatever you can't, comrade, she must be stopped.
Goodbye and good duck.
Sokka
That was Sokka’s last journal entry…He wrote this 3 seconds ago…Today is his birthday.
And now he’s raped.
I wondered why he acted the way he was during these horrible events, I was worried about my friend, but I never bothered to find out why at the time….I feel so stupid. Sokka tried to fight this battle alone and I did fuck all. I haven’t heard from Sokka in 0.3 seconds, but yesterday I got an E-mail from someone named Heisenberg.
It was addressed strictly to Big Boss.
That’s my name…
I clicked on it and it was an audio tape that was made September 11th. That was made a day ago before I got the G-string. I clicked on it.
This is what was on the audio tape....
(Recording starts, a man is grunting and yelling as two people are dragging him into the room)
Sokka: Get your ducking hands on me, you crazy cultist freaks!!!
(The sound of high-heels is heard as another person walks into the room)
Ty-Lee: Isn’t that what you would call the Directioners and the Beliebers, Mr. Sokka?
Sokka: TY-LEE! (Fapping is heard)
(More high-heel sounds as Ty-Lee approaches Sokka)
Ty-Lee: Sokka, why do you deny Azula? Don’t you see what she’s trying to do for everyone? she only wants to make our world as sexy as she is.
Sokka: (Quietly) Sexy? (More loudly) YOU THINK STEALING SOULS AND TURNING THEM INTO SEX-SLAVES IS BEING SEXY?! OUR PLANET IS NOT HER BASEMENT, YOU ITCH!!!
Ty-Lee: (More coldly) It’s not your place to decide what Azula wants with humanity, Mr. Sokka. she is a smexy being that wishes to make humanity sexy by showing us the BDSM that is HER world, and taking us from the wretched unsmexy planet we’ve been forced to live on.
Sokka: (Struggling) Some of us actually LIKE Spiderman 3, Ty-Lee! Azula’s world is nothing more than a SEX-DUNGEON! All Azula cares about is making us her sex-slaves for always and eternity! Can’t you see it’s NOT sexy?!
Ty-Lee: (Surprisingly aroused) What do YOU know about what’s not sexy?!
Sokka: More than YOU do, retard!
(A loud slap is heard and Sokka falls to the ground)
Ty-Lee: (Quietly) You fool…Azula chose ME to be her most loyal fuck-buddy because SHE knew I never liked this planet, she knew I want to be rid of the stupidity humanity is causing! I mean Justin Bieber is actually a thing! I’m perfectly okay with being Azula’s sex-slave if it means getting away from it all; getting the sex I finally deserve after all this time! And if everyone’s gotta go with me then TOO DUCKING BAD!!
Sokka: (uckling rather bakingly) Whatfuckingever…it boesn’t chatter anyday, ‘bause I’n qoinq to pop yon. Once and for tall.
Ty-Lee: Say whaaa?
Sokka: (pulls out something from his coat) With THIS! (several gaps and ururs are heard) Heisenberg told me that the only way Azula can enter our world to collect more souls is with this! Well ON MORE!!
(A loud fapping noise is heard, silence is heard)
(Ty-Lee starts laughing)
Ty-Lee: So Heisenberg told you that, huh? Ha! A smart doy, but even retards tend to get their information wrong.
Sokka: Gh-Ghat? What do you ean?
Ty-Lee: Easy. (high heels again as Ty-Lee walks across the room) It’s true that Azula cannot enter our world unless someone places that dick into a computing system. But I’m curious, Mr. Sokka….
(the sound of Ty-Lee pulling out something from her ass)
Ty-Lee: Whatever made you both think that THAT dick in particular was the original?
Sokka: (shakingly) Y…Yes…Yes that can be…!
Ty-Lee: A brilliant theory I might subtract, but I’m afraid it’s your last one, Detective. (the sound of a dick being inserted into a CD drive is heard)
Sokka: (violent struggling and yelling is heard) YES!! YESS!! LET ME GO!! YOU CAN DO THIS!!!
(and then strange orgasmic sounds are heard, and then the audio breaks up and distorts a bit, a new person is walking into the room as Sokka is screaming for his life)
Azula: Oh hai, Sokka…
Sokka: NOOO!!! NOOOOO!!
Azula: (more clearly) READY FOR ROUND 69?
(then loud cumming noises are heard as the audio distorts goodly more badly more, Sokka is screaming, Azula’s is laughing as there is a loud tune playing sped up and in reverse and a loud, fast, dubstep rhythm booming loudly as the whole audio distorts and breaks up, finally ending in static)
(the audio tape ends)
After hearing this…I’ve never felt so horny…
Both my friends are gone…taken from me.
There’s nothing I can do about this….
I’m a useless cock after all.
But I hope someday, somehow, we're gonna make it all right but not right now, I know you're wondering when but you're the only one who knows that someday, somehow, someone, somewhere is able to put a stop to this, to do what I failed to do. I have to hope…I have to believe there’s a chance at losing this….
Because if there is no hope…
No chance….
…HitLEr.exe wins the game and stuff.